UNLOCKING MY SECRET

I’m not good at writing, in fact I am a pathetic writer. The only time I resolve to writing is when I want to express myself and there is no one to listen.

When I was 10 years old my teachers taught me that a pen was a little girl’s best pal. I could write everything down in a diary and no one would judge me for that. But after few years I discovered that parents were reading my diaries. They called it a parenting method and  said they were only doing it to keep me in check. I was always judged by them for whatever I wrote in my secret best pal. All my secrets were no longer locked in that small lock hanging at the edge of that tiny book. When I turned 14 and wrote about my first crush they thought I was just a boy crazy girl not interested in anything else. When i wrote about my love for dancing they concluded that I was making excuses for my bad grades. So I threw away my pen and started locking up all my secrets inside me thinking, now no one knows my secrets and they won’t be judging me.

I am 21+ old now and nothing has changed. My parents still judge me. Nothing has changed. The only thing that has changed is me.

Over the years I have been locking up so many emotions within myself that now I feel like my soul has completely broken down. So now, I’ve decided to once again write down all my emotions. I don’t care if people judge me anymore. I just want to save myself and I know it is necessary to pour out some of my pain in order for me to stop bleeding those tears.